Cyberia District #1 Megacorp Valley –

A short impressive animation demonstrating what Megacorp Valley might structurally look like.

Logo for the Megacorp Valley district.

This is a “shap” (shit+map according to one employee) of Megacorp Valley. Every district has one. On the back a note reads: let me know if this is confusing enough.

An early draft of an evil megacorp skyscraper which looks wholly generic.

This photograph shows a member of the camera crew. The rear of this photograph simply reads “Gary trying to get a workable angle.”

[VHS #1]
Metropunks hanging about a subway. It’s all they seem to do.

The man, the myth himself: Mr Howard Hill looking rather chill.

A beautiful illustration of a cityscape by Mr Mystery.

Concept artwork for Lord Garf; king of the megacorps and the eternal enemy of Scotch Mike

Megacorp Valley is by far the busiest district in the Cyberia Universe. The majority of characters survive and die here, fighting over candy like toddlers with sugar withdrawals. Some playable characters only visit occasionally, hoping to take down the corrupt CEOs of the megacorps and to finally put an end to a nefarious system which serves only the filthy rich and, we’re presuming, the shadowy Cyberian Council.

The filthy rich tend to be squatting on the top floors of huge luxury skyscrapers like those seen in the above images. From there, they look down on the Valley ants with an evil gaze while polluting humanity with carcinogenic downloads for shitty augmented hardware which they think is great and they can’t live without.

Meanwhile everyone else is packed tightly into the urban squalor below, doing whatever it takes to survive one minute at a time. More often than not, this involves mindless violence, fraud, theft and some particularly strong painkillers to numb the pain. Owning a decent weapon will add a further five years to your lifespan while reducing it by a larger number because everyone else also has one. You never know who’s going to go ape shit so friendships between Saps is always volatile.

As we have already seen, there is no law and order in the whole of the Cyberia Universe. The Cyberpigs are in the pockets of the filthy rich and will gladly chop somebody’s nose off for a caffeine concentrate injection or a donut oozing with earthworm protein and synthetic vanilla.

It’s a miserable existence yet it’s still the second most desirable district in Cyberia. At least the occasional victim of a street robbery has some spare candy stashed on them somewhere. If you mug somebody in Little Amsterdam and all you’re likely to find is a reusable condom which has already seen the insides of several dead sexbots.

A couple of Metropunks standing around an unconvincing subway in Megacorp Valley.

Even more insufferable metropunks standing around a subway. The two fellas look like a shit version of Bros on a failing comeback tour.

Give Me Head’s Environment Team

The fella tasked with fleshing out the detail of these districts was Howard Hill. Howard had lied his way into getting an interview after quitting an industrial cleaning position earlier in the week which, in his words, “might as well have paid in punches to the cock”.

However, Cassidy knew Howard was lying because he was clueless about what position he was even applying for. This had been the first question they had asked him. According to Cassidy’s scribbles, Howard answered “general stuff to benefit the company and shit,” while trying not to nervously laugh or threaten them to get him on the payroll.

Regardless Cassidy took a shine to him for reasons far beyond our mortal comprehension. All we know is that Cassidy had scribbled down: “Stern liars burn fires,” which is profound wisdom only the galaxy brains at Mensa can decode.

Cassidy asked Howard if he could manage a small team of artists to which Howard said, “For sure. I could manage this country better than that Reagan queef even if they paid me minimum wage. Motherfucker’s gotta go but fuck politics, man. I’m here for the dollars.”

After Cassidy outlined the employment contract, Howard sat in silence for some time.

“So you want to pay me in bongs and pizza?”

“Basically, yeah.”

“And if this project booms, I’m a millionaire?”

“Also yeah.”

“I’m all in dick first. Where’s the dotted line?”

Concept artwork of what the Megacorp Valley streets might look like according to Mr Mystery. Also note the video game alien on the right-hand side which was used for the Headonist Empire logo.

More concept artwork by Mr Mystery.

So with no experience, no relevant skill set, no clue what was going on, Howard got the job.

He almost lasted the whole summer, but when his mother kicked him out for not paying any rent, he disappeared without trace, returning to doing what he was good at: blagging it into another shitty job.

As with all the Give Me Head employees, we are trying to hunt him down for any insights. We’ll keep you posted on all major developments.

More concept artwork of those beautiful cityscapes by Mr Mystery.

A still of the Tommy Hawk character on the Megacorp Valley set. He was played by Léonard Dubois who briefly worked as a look-alike for Andy Warhol before trying his hand at acting.