Cyberia District #3 Greaser Suburbs –

District logo for the Greaser Suburbs.

A “shap” (shit+map) of the Greaser Suburbs. On the back someone has scribbled: I can make it more vague and useless if necessary. Just buy me a new meth pipe.

Early concept artwork for the greasers in their natural habitat. Mr Mystery deserved a pay rise. Or just to be paid would’ve been nice.

One of the greasers sporting a bionic eye which allows him to strip search visitors by nod alone. He’s a non-playable character called Axel and he owns The Devil’s Spanner; a dive bar where all the greasers congregate.

Logo for The Devil’s Spanner; a place where all the greasers come together to drink fermented turnip and cockroach honey moonshine while talking about each other’s muscles. And by that we mean cars.

The best jukebox in Cyberia apparently. You’ll find it in the corner of the Devil’s Spanner.

Concept artwork for the mean streets of the Greaser Suburbs.

Another non-playable greaser called Flamez who had a tiny role. Sunglasses courtesy of Viv Bastard.

A greaser looking mental.

Even though this fella is only a cartoon, I wouldn’t want to spill his tub of grease while walking down a rainy alleyway at night.

A lady greaser standing inside a garage.

The Devil’s Spanner.

A greaser stood in front of his pride and joy.

A beautiful illustration of a muscle car.

A still of the Barry X character played by Noah Magalona. He’s firmly in greaser territory. Notice the hairdo development since the collectors’ card photoshoot. But–somewhat disappointingly–he’s still not greasing it up!

A handsome but terrifying greaser relaxing with Miss Machete which is the approximate size of a T-Rex milk tooth and twice as sharp.

Inside The Devil’s Spanner.

An extra on the set of The Devil’s Spanner.

Greaser Clip [VHS #1]
A still of the Bronqo character on set. He was going to be played by swimwear model Malcolm Draper who needed money for meth.

A cool still of “four finger Freddy”.

The Greaser Suburbs is probably our favourite district of them all. It just reeks of bollocks, hangover cures and recycled grease. Everyone who lives here–and we mean everyone–rebels against the usual metropunk attire by wearing the filthiest roadkill leathers on the market and listening to Puerto Rican cock rock loud enough to stir the devil.

It is also against their code to go longer than 24 hours without either beating up a buddy for a laugh or drinking a pint of pure ethanol out of a human skull. If you’re found guilty then all your drinking buddies must punish you by kicking your arse as if it’s Count Maxim’s face.

Yet at the same time, the greasers are the good guys. They are a tightly knit community who look out for each other. They also have a strict code of honour. If anyone in the entire world comes to their doorstep in desperate need of either resources or protection, after carrying out a light interrogation to make sure they’re not an enemy in disguise, they will provide.

In Cyberia, this is unheard of and has won them many unlikely allies over the years such as Yan. Yet it could also be their downfall.

The Greasers Love Big Muscles

Nothing gives the greasers a bigger erection than pure muscle. These boys live for their vehicles and mod the shit out of them. Not only do the vehicles look great, but they also serve as both armour and weaponry.

Garages, like those run by Barry X, can add a layer of super-titanium which is virtually impossible to penetrate with average street weapons. They can also add weight to vehicles in the event that they’re attacked by heavy-duty weaponry such as that carried by the Cyberpigs.

Furthermore their code makes it clear that the greasers will never fill the Cyberpigs’ pockets with candy. Because of this, saying the two gangs don’t exactly get along is an understatement. But these days they rarely cross paths unless the Cyberpigs spot somebody riding a vehicle they don’t like the look of.

But it’d take more than a threat from the Cyberpigs to deter greasers from driving around in their muscle cars. You could probably plant a mini nuclear bomb in the centre of the suburbs and announce that it will be detonated the next time someone fires up the engine of an illegal motor and they still wouldn’t give a hoot.

Russian Roulette with Russians Who Sweat

The greasers are the undisputed specialists to visit for cars, mods and augmentation technology. They have lived and breathed musclemania for at least a century. The many garages they run are like churches dedicated to the God of Grease. But all this is about to get disrupted.

Word has hit the street that the Russian mafia is about to expand their portfolio to the auto trade. It’s an unnecessary dick move by the mafia and one which can only ever lead to gang warfare.

According to an early storyboard sketch we have found, things escalate quickly between the rivals. The first shots are fired at Barry’s garage (nobody died), destroying equipment but creating a thirst for revenge.

“Those Russians think they have a right to take whatever they like,” Earl yells during a gang meeting. “Let’s teach those mothers a lesson!”

One factor that makes this situation interesting is the presence of the Yakuza and a playable character named Mr Kwong. The playable greaser characters in this district begin the story as excellent business bedfellows. However, Kwong’s loyalty isn’t guaranteed and he could flip at any moment which would present a mammoth problem for the greasers.

After this incident there isn’t anything else for us to go off. We think that this is where the tabletop role-playing element comes in and events spiral in whichever direction the players decide to take it in.

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